


someday came suddenly

by orphan_account



Category: Dragon Age II
Genre: Dragon Age II Spoilers, Light Angst, M/M, Purple!Hawke, Retrospective
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-29
Updated: 2016-01-29
Packaged: 2018-05-17 00:04:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 989
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5846104
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>everything has gone to shit, but at least hawke looks good <i>and</i> gets the guy.</p>
            </blockquote>





	someday came suddenly

**Author's Note:**

> gratuitous abuse of italics, probably commas and other things considering, and the fact that im completely enamored with the Kiss between hawke and fenris near the battle before you have to put orsino down for being a hypocrite. 
> 
> and also a birthday present for starkjrs??? 
> 
> i hope you like it

Hawke finds it difficult to think that _this_ —the Chantry being torn apart in an act of desperation from a man who was _pushed_ too far, in the name of a “sacrifice,” in the name of _mages’ rights_ is what currently is happening, but. It is. Somewhere in the back of his mind, he wonders if there would've been a time where this wasn't necessary—the explosion rocks the city and destroys and _kills._ That the look on Anders' face when Hawke confronts him _isn't_  that of a finally-broken-beyond-repair man. Perhaps he's been reading too much of Varric's _writings_ , with how he waxes poetic, but it was the only thing that comes to his mind as the blond mage sits and awaits his trial.

(he _couldn't_ , of course, and the stares he got were that of concern; but despite anders' desperation he deserved to _redeem_ himself)

Once things were settled with the blonde, for the most part, it was a rush to _leave_ ; to get back to some sort of safety. They made it relatively without into one of the buildings that hadn't been destroyed by Anders' wrath; his _vengeance._ It was a close call, but they're _okay_. They're okay and preparing for Meredith to finally catch up to them, to face the inevitable.

He wonders how Fenris can _stay_ like he is, milling around the center square while the others also mill about; waiting waiting _waiting_ for the end—Orsino stands tall, determined to stay alive, to prove a point; and Hawke feels the familiar sense of protectiveness that he had for everyone in their little friend circle rise all over again. It mirrors Orsino’s, he thinks vaguely, though there is something _else_ in the First Enchanter’s visage that makes Hawke nervous.

Regardless of the other things happening around him, Hawke can’t help but frown slightly at the fact that he doesn’t understand _how_ Fenris made the decision to stick with him, even though he was a _mage_. The kinds of people who _hurt_ him, turned him into a slave—but he’s _staying_. Fenris is watching as Hawke talks to the others—he can see the white haired elf eyeing him as he continues on, one last pep talk on his lips to Varric, one last hurrah for their _cause_ as the dwarf jokes about too long goodbyes and getting teary eyed.

Hawke pauses in front of Fenris, the last person he makes his presence known to, and the words just come _out._ Concern laces the elf’s eyes behind the amusement, and Hawke wonders if Fenris know _now_ just how much he adores the elf. How much he would go through to see even a quick quirk of the shorter male's lips at some wise-crack Hawke made. It's overwhelming, just how _much_ Hawke thinks about this, and he doesn't want to lose it.

(lose _fenris._ )

As he stands there before the white haired elf, the acrid scent of flesh burning and the faint, muffled sounds of screaming does _nothing_ for his nerves. Hawke can tell that he’s doing that thing again as he watches the elf's eyes flit to his hands. The one where he fiddles with the threads of his tunic, fingers deft as they seek out the thin threads, and he tries to breathe. One, two, exhale. Glancing down at the red silk favor around Fenris' wrist, at the sight of _his_ _own_ crest on the elf's hip, Hawke feels familiar warmth rise in his heart at the implication. Even with the three year absence the elf took, he still _had_ those things. Still kept them on his person.

(he loves this elf, so so _so much_ )

Hawke knows that he’s delaying the inevitable, the Final Moment; and it’s time to actually own up to his choices, to _help_ in some way, after calling out Meredith’s insanity—the resulting aftermath of the _Chantry exploding_ , Anders’s easy willingness to let Hawke put a blade in his back _i wont apologize hawke i wont and i_ ** _want_** _this_. Hawke is all too familiar with the “last days on the earth” speech that rises from the depths of his chest; and Fenris makes a face when he starts to speak. It’s almost as if fish soup was brought out before the elf, and the way he wrinkles his nose in disdain at the words makes Hawke laugh.

It’s an odd sound in the silence, and he can feel the others’ stares—mostly _Varric’s_ , he knows the dwarf is most definitely “researching” for his tales of heroism—yet he can’t when Fenris locks eyes with him. There’s a solemness to the elf that has Hawke swallowing down the remaining humor before the gentle press of an armored hand cups his cheek. The touch is oddly gentle for the elf, something that still throws Hawke off considering all that the other male has gone through; but he loves it all the same.

“I admit, going this… _far_ has been interesting. Even though you have some... questionable decision making skills," Fenris' voice is quiet, an attempt to give them some sense of privacy, and Hawke gives the elf a wry grin.

“I can most definitely take you to even _more_ ‘interesting’ places, just you wait,” he responds immediately, and Fenris’ chuckle is low in his throat before he moves. He moves closer, closer, _impossibly_ close; and they’re kissing. The warmth bubbles over into an inferno, and if he wasn’t _used_ to the sudden surges of affection from the prickly elf Hawke is pretty sure he might’ve short circuited and spat a fireball from his fingertips into the unsuspecting arms of his friends. Probably.

Either way, Hawke's mind _stops_ because Fenris is kissing him; and the destruction, the death, the _everything_ is ignored for this very important and very precious moment.

He wasn’t going to _lose_ any of this; even if it’s his own life he’ll put on the line to keep it.

**Author's Note:**

> title from attack attack!'s song "bro, ashley's here"


End file.
